Be careful what you post online, because you never know who’ll read it. Lizzo, Green Day, Chance The Rapper, and Cardi B all got a chance to fire back at their trolls in another hilarious edition of ‘Mean Tweets.’
“ ‘Lizzo. Bus passes and happy meals. Two things that I imagine Lizzo has seen a lot of,’” the “Truth Hurts” singer read out loud during the latest edition of “Mean Tweets” on the Nov. 13 episode of Jimmy Kimmel Live. Lizzo literally laughed off this online hate (as if she hasn’t dealt with worse in her life and career.) “Yeah, I’m a big b*tch, and I ride a bus – a tour bus, mother—ker. Where’s yours?” Flaunting your success in the face of your critics? That must feel “good as hell.” Good on ya, Lizzo.
Chance the Rapper was actually shocked to read a mean comment someone made about him. “ ‘Chance the rapper? More like Chance the worthless, spineless, d—kless, soulless, purposeless, virtueless sellout. Nice Doritos commercial, you piece of sh-t.’ “ he read, before busting out in a laugh. “There are people that don’t like me? What the fuck?” Cardi B was similarly confused over what one troll said about her performance. “ ‘ I just watched a muted performance of Cardi B, and that b-tch just looks loud without any sound on. Like no thank you,’ “ she read.
“How do I look loud? How do I look loud?” Cardi genuinely asked. “I’m loud? I don’t even think I’m like, loud.” The sincerity in Cardi’s voice is quite moving, and she seems to take a second to consider this criticism. Then, she seems to understand that she probably shouldn’t give weight to anyone who says that she’s too ‘loud’ for their liking. “Suck my a—“
This music edition of Mean Tweets crossed many genres. There was country music (“ ‘I’d rather listen to a barn full of baby pigs being vaccinated…than Luke Bryan’s new song,’ “ read Luke Bryan. “I have vaccinated baby pigs. And that’s awful.”) There was classic rock ( “Alice Cooper looked 65 in 1972. How is he still alive?”) There was also K-Pop, as Monsta X read out a tweet that said every member “look(s) like a jock that’s also a vampire.”
Perhaps the read of the night went towards Green Day. “ ‘Why does Tre Cool from Green Day look like the emo version of Ted Cruz?’ ” read the drummer from the punk/rock band. Add that to the growing list of things Ted Cruz looks like. Singer Billie Joe Armstrong, realizing that he’s in a band with a Donald Trump sycophant, then pointed out that their bassist, Mike Dirnt, looks “like [Vladimir] Putin.” #NoColusion
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