I miss my ex - despite her emotional and physical abuse

DEAR DEIDRE: DESPITE my ex being emotionally and physically abusive, I miss her every day.

She’s 28 and I’m a woman of 29.

We separated last March when I discovered she’d been sleeping with her co-worker.

My team and I are working safely from home but we are here to help you as always.

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My friends all agreed that I had done the right thing as she had been very controlling throughout our four-year relationship.

She would decide when I could visit friends or family, and she would make daily demands to go through my phone.

At night, I’d often wake up to her touching me intimately – apparently it turned her on to do it while I was asleep.

I found out on Instagram recently that she’s dating someone new. I know I shouldn’t care, but I can’t stop thinking about her.

DEIDRE SAYS: You can’t just turn feelings off like a light switch.

It takes time to move on from someone you’ve got used to having in your life, particularly as she made herself such a big part of yours.

Your ex was abusive so I’m sending you my support pack Abusive Partner to help you process your feelings.

Counselling might help you to let go of this relationship. Contact BACP (bacp.co.uk, 01455 883300).