DEAR DEIDRE: I HAVE turned from Miss Prim And Proper into a harlot.
I send naked pictures to strangers and meet young men for sex. I don’t recognise myself.
I am a woman of 42 and have always taken pride in my appearance and how I conduct myself.
But everything changed after I lost two people very dear to me.
Three years ago my boyfriend died of a heart attack. He was 36 and dropped down dead playing five-a-side football. I was devastated.
Then my ex sent me a message one night via email, asking how I was. We started seeing each other regularly — as friends — and I loved spending time with him again.
For more advice from Dear Deidre
No issue is too small, too large or too embarrassing. Read our personal replies here.
- Dear Deidre on Sex
- Dear Deidre on Relationships
- Dear Deidre on Marriage
- Dear Deidre on Family
- Dear Deidre on Parenting
- Dear Deidre on Grief
I was floored when he told me he’d been diagnosed with cancer and was waiting for an organ transplant.
I continued to see him until he was too poorly and I lost him 18 months ago. He was 47.
I’ve been so lost since losing these two people who meant so much to me.
My sister said I should get out more and meet people but obviously that wasn’t possible during Covid so I joined a few dating sites.
Younger men were interested in me, which felt strange, but I’ve always been told I look good for my age.
I went out with a couple of guys in their 30s and then I went out with one guy of 28 and another of just 23. I had sex with each of them.
I have started sending out naked pictures and videos to anyone who wants them — and believe me, there are a lot of guys who will do anything for a naughty picture.
I am also drinking too much. It gets me through the lonely nights and the weekends when I’m not at work.
Work seems to keep me going. I have wonderful colleagues, but they have no idea about this other side of my life. I’m not sure what to do.
DEIDRE SAYS: Your double bereavement means that any form of escape from thinking about your lost loved ones feels good. But this isn’t you.
You are not someone who drinks too much and sleeps around. You are a proud lady who has been blindsided by these huge losses.
Rather than hiding from your pain by attention-seeking and drinking, talk to one of your supportive colleagues or a friend about your losses. A night out with them would do you good.
Find a new hobby for your free time. Check out meetup.com for ideas.
Get help with your drinking through We Are With You (wearewithyou.org.uk) and my support pack on Bereavement explains where you will find some good counselling.
NEXT IN TODAY'S DEAR DEIDRE My dad hates that I don't work – despite the fact I'm caring for him
READ DEIDRE'S NEW PHOTO CASEBOOK Chloe tells Kelly she is pregnant but Toby isn't delighted
Source: Read Full Article
