KERRY Katona has revealed Celebrity SAS: Who Dares Wins was like "therapy" and helped her grieve.
The 40-year-old's life has been full of huge highs and devastating lows – including drug abuse, bankruptcy, rehab, and battles with her bipolar disorder.
Kerry also lost her ex-husband George Kay last year who died after biting into a ball of cocaine in front of staff at a Holiday Inn.
They met as teenagers, but started dating in 2012 after bumping into each other in Warrington.
During their three-year marriage they had a daughter, Dylan-Jorge, and George became a step-dad to his wife's four children.
In October 2015 ex-Atomic Kitten singer Kerry announced they had split, alleging the one-time Warrington Wolves winger assaulted her.
Speaking ahead of the series launch of Celebrity SAS, Kerry said: "I've got a lot of closure doing the show.
"I wanted to prove something to everybody – that I've turned my life around.
"I've been through hell and back several times and I thought 'why not give it another go'.
"I wanted to make the kids proud too. But actually that show gave me the best therapy of my life.
"It gave me closure. I was able to grieve. Every time I talk about it upsets me.
"It was one of the worst and best shows I've ever done. It beats I'm A Celebrity hands down.
"The aftercare has been phenomenal. I've been on a journey for a long time and SAS wasn't the start of my recovery, I've been on the start of that for a few years now.
"I think SAS was the topper of the recovery. It gave me closure and made me realise about myself, who I am and that I don't need to prove anything to anybody."
Kerry escaped relatively unscathed from injury while taking part in the Channel 4 series – unlike co-star Saira Khan who is now taking legal action against the show.
Kerry: "I just had pains and aches. It is a physical show, but for me it was more of a mental challenge."
She then jokingly added: "[I got] frost bite on my nipples – that's why I had to get a new boob job!"
Kerry continued: "I'm a go-getter. You can knock me down but I won't stay down. And if I do stay down it'll be my decision.
"It's given me closure. I have been able to let things go and appreciate what I've got, what's gone and what's coming.
"I'm grateful to the universe for what I've had."
- Celebrity SAS: Who Dares Wins airs on Channel 4, Sunday at 9pm.
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