Acknowledging that the people she’s publicly insulted in the past did not deserve her horrible tweets, the wife of John Legend deems herself as an ‘insecure, attention seeking troll.’
AceShowbiz –Chrissy Teigen is continuing on her decade-long “path of self-improvement” by reaching out to people she’s publicly insulted in the past in the wake of her “humbling” cyberbullying scandal.
The model, cookbook author, and TV personality has been laying low in recent weeks after Courtney Stodden claimed to have been on the receiving end of torrid abuse by Teigen a decade ago, telling the non-binary model to kill themselves in private Twitter messages sent when Stodden was 16.
John Legend‘s wife responded by apologizing for her past behavior as an “insecure, attention seeking troll” in a series of tweets in early May, branding herself “ashamed and completely embarrassed” by her rude remarks.
Now, after a further period of self-reflection, Teigen has opened up about the empathy she has developed for others living in the spotlight, admitting her own life highs and lows have ensured she is not the same woman who took aim at struggling celebrities when she first joined Twitter as a young model.
In a blog post on Medium, the mother-of-two wrote, “Not a day, not a single moment has passed where I haven’t felt the crushing weight of regret for the things I’ve said in the past.”
Teigen admitted Stodden wasn’t the only one who deserved an apology, and she’s already taken steps to try and make amends.
“I’m in the process of privately reaching out to the people I insulted…,” she wrote. “I understand that they may not want to speak to me. I don’t think I’d like to speak to me… But if they do, I am here and I will listen to what they have to say, while apologizing through sobs.”
“There is simply no excuse for my past horrible tweets. My targets didn’t deserve them. No one does,” Teigen continued.
“Many of them needed empathy, kindness, understanding and support, not my meanness masquerading as a kind of casual, edgy humor. I was a troll, full stop. And I am so sorry.”
Looking back at her “a**hole past,” she questions her logic at displaying such “cruel” behavior, insisting there is “no justification” for her actions, although she is adamant she is a changed woman.
“I am no longer the person who wrote those horrible things,” she explained. “I grew up, got therapy, got married, had kids, got more therapy, experienced loss and pain, got more therapy and experienced more life. AND GOT MORE THERAPY.”
“Life has made me more empathetic. I’m more understanding of what motivates trolling – the instant gratification that you get from lashing out and clapping back, throwing rocks at someone you think is invincible because they’re famous.”
“Also, I know now how it feels to be on the receiving end of incredible vitriol. Believe me, the irony of this is not lost on me.”
Now Teigen wants to continue setting a better example for her children, and prove herself to those willing to give her a second chance.
“I’ve been on a path of self-improvement for the past decade and that path is going to continue,” she shared. “I have so much love to give if you are open and willing to accept it. And if not, that’s okay too. That’s something I work on being more okay with every day. I know I let you down, but I hope I can make you proud.”
She concluded her post by adding, “I ask that you allow me, as I promise to allow you, to own past mistakes and be given the opportunity to seek self-improvement and change.”
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