My cheating husband is cosying up to gym mistress despite last chance warning | The Sun

DEAR DEIDRE: WOMEN who go for married men are like heat-seeking missiles when my husband comes into view.

I’m 39 and he is 41. We’ve been together for 12 years and have two children, aged nine and seven.

He’s always had a female friend simmering away in the background.

There was one in particular when we first got together.

I was never comfortable about her as she had a reputation for going for taken men.

After finding flirty messages from her, I put my foot down and banned him from communicating with her.

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He protested that she was only messing around and didn’t mean anything by it, but I’d had enough.

Within six months he’d developed another friendship, with a woman from our gym.

Surprise, surprise, she had had an affair already with her married boss.

Again I found flirty messages between them. This time he was whining to her about how unhappy he was at home.

He swore nothing had happened between them. But when I bumped into her at the gym, she admitted he’d visited her home for some “cosy sessions”.

I told my husband if it happened again, I’d leave him, so he blocked her.

But now he is hanging around another woman at our gym.

Everyone knows she recently broke up with a married man — her brother’s friend.

I asked him to explain what was wrong with me, but he insisted that I am his type.

So why are these women so different from me?

He was cheated on by a few of his exes, so he knows it hurts.

I don’t understand why he takes such risks. Does he get a thrill out of it?

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DEIDRE SAYS: It was reasonable to give your husband a second chance but now he’s had so many and hasn’t proved worthy.

All you have to reproach yourself for was being too trusting.

Having intimate and sexual connections with other women is usually why married men cheat.

They see their affairs as something that doesn’t require a deep emotional bond, which he shares with you.

This means that there is no real romantic connection between them.

You are not to blame. He has a history of cheating so it seems unlikely he will stop without the help of a counsellor.

Suggest couple counselling via tavistockrelationships.org.

My support pack Can’t Be Faithful? explains more.

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